ADHD is a frequently misunderstood mental health diagnosis, especially where women are concerned. More often than not, ADHD is characterized as a boy’s condition with hyperactive, bouncing off the walls behavior. For women, however, ADHD is much more subtle — and looks nothing like bouncing off the walls.
Due to the complex nature and variance of symptoms, ADHD in women is frequently overlooked or misdiagnosed. Let’s shed some light on the hidden struggles that women face with ADHD and how therapy can be a helpful step forward.
The Hidden Struggles
Where men often display hyperactive symptoms, women struggle with the quieter, inattentive symptoms. With fewer behavioral issues, your battle is less likely to be noticed by others.
Inattention may encompass the obvious difficulty focusing or maintaining attention on a task. It can also include:
Frequent daydreaming or spacing out
Forgetfulness
Appearing scatterbrained or losing track of objects
Struggling with project completion
Procrastination, planning, and prioritization challenges
These symptoms can be easily downplayed as just an “off day” or a common issue anyone can have. Beneath the surface, however, they can be burdensome to your quality of life. Since these symptoms aren’t outwardly troublesome, the ADHD can go undiagnosed well into adulthood, years later than men receive theirs.
The Masking Phenomenon
Where ADHD is concerned, women are experts at the art of hiding or intentionally downplaying symptoms — a phenomenon known as masking. In hopes of appearing and feeling normal, you mask your experience so as not to draw unnecessary attention.
This can involve overcompensating with socially acceptable habits and behaviors. You may expend a great deal of energy suppressing impulsive behaviors, focusing on a task with intense tunnel vision, or being meticulously organized.
Masking can seem like a great way to fit in with the neurotypical crowd in the short term, but it places you at a great disadvantage in the long run. Constantly making yourself fit into the wrong mold can lead to burnout, stress, an altered identity, and lower self-esteem. You may also cause a constant, underlying anxiety over someone finding out your secret. Maintaining the facade that everything is “normal” comes with a cost.
Hormonal Influences
As a woman, you’re going to experience some significant life chapters that men don’t. Going through puberty, pregnancy (if that’s where your path leads), and then perimenopause and menopause all come with their own specific hormone shifts. You also have the monthly hormonal roller coaster around your menstrual cycle. Any one of these fluctuations can exacerbate your ADHD symptoms.
These shifts can make it that much harder to identify ADHD as the root cause, partly due to the inconsistency and partly due to severity. During these times, the ADHD flare-ups may also lead to added challenges, like emotional dysregulation or cognitive issues.
The Daily Life Impact
No matter how far society has come or how many strides have been made in terms of equality, there is still this expectation placed on women to handle it all — be caregivers, homemakers, and professionals. Oh, and do it with a smile on your face like nothing is wrong.
ADHD can make everyday responsibilities feel completely overwhelming. Getting household chores done…an uphill battle. Finishing that work project…zapped you of your energy. Remembering the utility bill is due on Wednesday and garbage day is Friday…you should get an award.
The Role of Therapy
Medication is generally the first thing that comes to mind with ADHD, but it isn’t the only effective treatment approach. Therapy can be a critical component of treatment, especially for women.
Not only can you work on developing strategies to manage your symptoms, but you can also work on emotional regulation, rebuilding self-esteem, and exploring your experience within a safe and comfortable space. This avenue can help you reconnect with your true self and regain the quality of life that has long been compromised. Contact me to schedule an appointment and learn more about how anxiety counseling can help your ADHD symptoms.