Grief is one emotion that is a universal experience. It will touch everyone at some point during their lifetime. Generally, this is an emotional response to the death of a loved one or a significant loss. This can also extend beyond those instances.
Grief can be complex, presenting as something called anticipatory grief. This type of grief, also known as pre-death grief, is expecting or experiencing grief before the person has passed. Since the event hasn’t officially occurred yet, the process can be a bit complicated.
Here we’ll explore six signs of anticipatory grief and touch upon how to deal with them and treat the anxiety around them.
Anxiety About the Future
Daily life comes with a garden variety of stressors and plenty of hustle and bustle. That is typically more than enough.
For those who are experiencing anticipatory grief, there may be an additional level of anxiety about the future surrounding the loss of a specific person. This could be an anxiety about finances, balancing work responsibilities, or living arrangements without them. You could have concerns about how to deal with stressful situations after a loss.
This persistent worry about what your life will be like can hurt your quality of life, long before the person or situation has been lost.
Overwhelming Sadness
It’s normal to have fluctuations in emotions, especially as you navigate stressful times. Another sign you may be dealing with anticipatory anxiety is having an overwhelming sense of sadness.
Periodically, you’ll find yourself crying frequently or experiencing waves of deep sadness. Simply thinking about an anticipated loss brings you a flood of intense emotions that may be difficult to cope with.
Feelings of Guilt
Guilt is a common component of grief after the loss has occurred. With anticipatory grief, there can be feelings of guilt while the person is still alive or you’re still in a given situation. You may encounter mixed feelings of relief and sadness, which in turn can trigger feelings of guilt.
Frequent Mood Changes
Since you may be dealing with some combination of anxiety, sadness, guilt, and other intense emotions, it’s not uncommon to go through mood swings. Minor inconveniences may cause you to feel more easily frustrated. Annoyances can lead to irritability. Normal day-to-day stress can cause you to feel instantly overwhelmed.
Sleep Disruption
Similar to standard grief, anticipatory grief may often disrupt your usual sleep patterns. This can include restlessness, insomnia, difficulty staying asleep, and poor overall sleep quality.
From the interrupted sleep, you’re more prone to experience additional cognitive challenges like difficulty making decisions, slower processing time, and memory issues.
Withdrawal and Isolation
When managing all that comes with anticipatory grief, you may find yourself isolating from friends and family. The activities that you enjoyed doing or the spaces you found to be comfortable may not feel so welcoming at the moment. Having these experiences can lead you to believe no one understands it, so you pull away.
How to Cope with Anticipatory Grief
Acknowledge Your Feelings
Having grief is a natural human emotion. No matter what you’re going through, don’t be afraid to own these emotions. Allow yourself to feel your grief and give grace during the process.
Lean on Your Loved Ones
No matter how you’re feeling, let your trusted friends and family in on your situation. Explain to them how you’re feeling and how they can support you.
Attend a Support Group
Being able to share your experience with others who are going through a similar situation can offer validation for your feelings. Plus, having an outside set of ears that won’t judge you may be something you need.
Seeking Treatment
Grief, in any form, doesn’t need to be something you have to experience alone. Counseling and therapeutic intervention can help you get to the root of what’s triggering this grief, help build effective coping mechanisms, and assess your relationship with the person or situation causing you grief. To read more about Trauma and Loss please click on the link..
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